Day 13 of Lenten Journey

For some odd reason, I dreamt about writing on a chalkboard. I know, weird.What the heck was I writing? who knows.... But have you ever had a dream that impacted your whole  life?  I have some of the oddest dreams, sometimes I wake up laughing out loud. Other dreams I have had in my past have not been so funny. Dreams of falling. Dreams of accidents. Of death, even. I still remember a dream I had as a child , vivid today as then. Some dreams of mine make me blush! bahahaha...Then there are the dreams that seem so very real, I have been awakened in tears.Not "seemed real". WERE real. One happened about a month before Mimi passed. It was a dream about Daddy. My daddy! without going on and on about him, (I'd like to, but don't we all have the best daddy in the world? Well, I know some did not and for those, my heart breaks. But mine? Da Best). Anyway, about a year before he died, Daddy started showing signs of dementia. It was so sad to see him this way. Right at the beginning of it, he told Terry on a visit, "Terry, my head isn't right!" terry, who always called him "Mr. Powell" until he died said, "Mr. Powell, your brain is better than mine!" And sweet Daddy said, "no, no it isn't". Daddy knew something was wrong and he was right. He became paranoid at times/ angry sometimes ("Where are my car keys?"*Um, Daddy, we HID them!). He was anxious and yet, was obsessed with their little dog, Wee Sing, who remained a faithful companion to him (as well as Mimi, of course haha), but even that was an obsession. Anyway,long story short ,(yeah, right, you are saying), the last visit I had with Daddy was not a good one.It was the day before he died. He was confused and he wasn't Daddy. I had that image for the longest time. Until the dream. I dreamt on Nov. 2, 2015 this: (I wrote it all down immediately b/c if I don't, on those kinds of dreams, I start forgetting...!) So, here is what I wrote that morning. Note the words are choppy---I was jotting them down, not in my usual "prose writing" but writing quickly, using abbreviations,  as if taking notes from a lecture. I am going a picture of it to post but will also "decipher" the note as my handwriting was terrible):

"I woke myself up sobbing. (In my dream), I was with friends--I was looking@some stuff in my Bible  and part of the sheet was sticking out. I looked @ it --it was circled. Daddy had circled/squared a box of some notes I had made. (here I drew a box with an arrow to show exactly how it looked. A rectangle. Written: "perfect! Outstanding! Jehovah Yahweh!  ( that Jehovah Yahweh part was strange as I never remember Daddy ever saying those words, much less writing them. But it was there!).
I sobbed b/c he had written this the day before he died. (re-reading this, I guess God was giving me a new vision of Daddy to erase the horrible one I had on the day before he passed!)..." I screamed, "Daddy left me a note!" I was overwhelmed with joy and sadness and fell on the floor crying. Ex.3:15. When I got up , I felt shaky all over/tingly"

Just re-reading this, makes me have chills. I know Daddy came to visit me. To encourage me. He was THE best encouraging person in my life. He would say,"Janice, don't short circuit yourself!You are smart! You can write. You can do anything you want to!"...This was huge for me b/c I know I broke his heart when I dropped out of college. I told him at the time, "Daddy, I can't go back. I don't want to waste your money. I just can't do it". I remember going to talk to Mama Powell ,(Daddy's mother), and telling her how I dreaded telling daddy I wanted to drop out of college. We were sitting on the front porch (where we ALWAYS sat), rocking in the rocking chairs and looking out the screen porch to the huge Crape Myrtle bushes that were in front of her house (yes, I spelled it right, I looked it up. HA!). Those bushes were HUGE, FYI. Anyway, we were sitting there (yes, sorry, I like to ramble) and I said, "Mama, I am so scared." She said, "why, honey?" as she rocked and fanned herself with the East Lake UMC fan on the wooden stick. (She had on, most likely, a flowered dress that hugged her hips and she always had a little belt and a handkerchief under it b/c one of her eyes always teared up). I said, "Mama, Daddy is going to be SOO mad at me. I want to drop out of college and come home. I have a boyfriend (giggle)". OH I LOVED MAMA !!!!!!!!! She was so much FUN and I could tell her practically anything!!!! She was my favorite grandmother. She just "got me". She looked at me and stopped rocking and fanning and said, "you are just like me". (I started smiling then and knew this was going to be good). She continued, "I hated school. Always did. Listen, your daddy will be ok. He'll be mad for a few days but he'll get over it". OHHHH, those were the words I needed to hear! If MAMA said it was OK, then it was. And, don't think for a minute I didn't throw her under the bus when Daddy started flipping out. (sorry, MAMA). I said, "Mama even understood!" (that would be  YOUR mama, Daddy-o)!  He ignored that, haha. But, just like Mama said, he got over it in a few days. But, even having Mama's support, I had this tiny bit of sadness that I hurt Daddy's heart. Make that a BIG big of sadness. Not for me, but for him. I knew I was doing the right thing (I GUESS I did????), but , as always, Daddy forgave me. But, I think Daddy knew that I had a teensy bit of potential for writing and he knew that I could build on that in college (it was all the OTHER courses, Daddy, that I couldn't do!). Daddy was SO smart. He just didn't understand that I wasn't. HAHA! I was more "smart" like Mama Powell. (Mama who had 6 children, 5 of them BOYS. --one baby boy died in infancy. And she had 1 girl). I miss Daddy's advice SO much. Even now. But guess what else? I miss MAMA'S Advice, too! Not only her advice, but her joy for life. She was F-U-N.What I loved about Mary Dean Powell? She loved to LAUGH. She told stories and would laugh so hard that tears would roll down her cheeks. And you would be laughing too! She was blunt , also.(insert emoli shock face) Once she looked at me and said, "Bless your heart. you have the Powell hips". Oh gee. Thanks,Mama. One story she told was how she decided one day that since HER mama wouldn't let her wear hose, she would make her own. So she got a stick and wet some COW DUNG and painted her legs with it. She said when she walked in the house that her mother (MAMA DEAN) almost croaked. And we would laugh and laugh. I loved she was a bit naughty. Just like me. She also loved my Barbie dolls b/c she said she loved dolls and wish she had her old ones to give me. We would open my Barbie trunk (after me walking to her house dragging it the whole way , which was several blocks away!) and she would hold up a tiny Barbie shoe and shake her head and say "my my! Look at those little shoes!" And I would give her my  MIDGE doll to "play with"  and I would play with BARBIE and we would have THE best time ever. Sometimes my cousin, Susan, came too and we had dolls all over the place! .. I just loved her so much and I would HOPE that a little bit of MAMA POWELL comes out in me when I play dolls with my grand-daughters!  AND, when they might come to me worrying about something when they are 18. I, too, am going to start telling them some of my naughty stories so that they will see I'm not perfect (like I'm SURE they think I am. HAHAHAHA)...


 

So, dreams can be the best. they can take you back to a safe place. A lovely time. Or can create something all new. New memories. New conversations. I believe God let Daddy come to me in that dream! No doubt! Look how many times (too many to count) that dreams were the catalyst in the Bible. OK, so I googled it. Here's what one writer wrote: 
 

Old Testament Dreams and Visions
God used visions in the Old Testament to reveal His plan, to further His plan, and to put His people in places of influence.

Abraham (Genesis 15:1): God used a vision to restate the Abrahamic Covenant, reminding Abram that he would have a son and be the father of many nations.

Abimelech (Genesis 20:1-7): Abraham's wife, Sarah, was beautiful—so beautiful that when Abraham came into a new area he occasionally feared that the local ruler would kill him and take Sarah for himself. Abraham told Abimelech king of Gerar that Sarah was his sister (she was his half-sister). Abimelech took Sarah into his harem, but God sent him a dream telling him not to touch Sarah because she was Abraham's wife. The king returned Sarah to her husband the next morning; the dream had protected Sarah and safeguarded God's plan for Sarah to be the mother of His chosen people.

Jacob (Genesis 28:10-17): Jacob, with his mother's help, stole Esau’s firstborn inheritance. Jacob then fled Esau's anger, and on his journey he had his famous dream of a ladder reaching to heaven on which angels ascended and descended. In this dream Jacob received God's promise that Abraham's blessing would be carried on through him.

Joseph (Genesis 37:1-11): Joseph is one of the most famous dreamers, and one of the most famous dream-interpreters, in the Bible. His first recorded dreams are found in Genesis 37. They showed through easily deciphered symbols that Joseph's family would one day bow to him in respect. His brothers didn't appreciate the dream and in their hatred sold Joseph into slavery. Eventually, Joseph ended up in prison in Egypt.

Pharaoh's cupbearer and baker (Genesis 40): While in prison Joseph interpreted some dreams of Pharaoh's cupbearer and baker. With God's guidance, he explained that the cupbearer would return to Pharaoh's service, but the baker would be killed.

Pharaoh (Genesis 41): Two years later, Pharaoh himself had a dream which Joseph interpreted. God’s purpose was to raise Joseph to second-in-command over Egypt and to save the Egyptians and the Israelites from a horrible famine.

Samuel (1 Samuel 3): Samuel had his first vision as a young boy. God told him that judgment was coming upon the sons of Samuel’s mentor, Eli. The young Samuel was faithful to relay the information, and God continued to speak to Samuel through the rest of his life.


Cornelius (Acts 10:1-6): God spoke to an Italian centurion named Cornelius who feared the God of the Jews. In his vision, Cornelius saw an angel who told him where to find Simon Peter and to send for him and listen to his message. Cornelius obeyed the vision, Peter came and preached, and Cornelius and his household full of Gentiles were saved by the grace of God.

Peter (Acts 10:9-15): While Peter was praying on the rooftop of a house in Joppa, God gave him a vision of animals lowered in a something like a sheet. A voice from heaven told Peter to kill the animals (some of which were unclean) and eat them. The vision served to show that Christians are not bound by the kosher law and that God had pronounced Gentiles “clean”; that is, heaven is open to all who follow Jesus.

John (Revelation): Nearly the entire book of Revelation is a vision John had while exiled on the island of Patmos. John’s vision explains in more detail some of the events that God had shown Daniel. 

******************************************************************************************************************

So there you have it!  ! I do believe God STILL uses dreams. I know this is true in my case. I ALSO had a dream about 15 years ago of going up a staircase and there, at a table, were both sets of my grandparents! They were eating and laughing. And when I walked in, they all stopped and screamed, "there's Janice! Come sit with us!" And I did. And I listened while they talked and ate. I was giddy with joy and excitement and couldn't believe what my eyes were seeing. But, I knew it wouldn't last, this visit. I became sad. REALLY sad. I wanted to STAY!  But I knew I had to go. I said, "I have to go! But I don't want to!" And they all hugged me. And told me it was ok. I was so very sad as I walked  down the spiral staircase (back to earth?). Again, when I woke up I knew I had had a visitation. I had been given a glimpse of heaven. It was amazing. I just wish I had written it down like I did with Daddy's dream b/c I have already forgotten some of the details. But, to this day, I get all warm and fuzzy thinking about it. Because I KNOW I was seeing them at heaven's table. And I KNOW I will get to eat with them at the heavenly banquet. ....
.Dreams like that are so amazing. Mainly because they come unexpectedly. Not when WE want them to come, but when GOD sees fit for us to have that special gift.  And  it just makes me feel better knowing that God still uses that time when we are resting and when we are quiet and still to come to us. When HE wants to give us a gift. When HE sees that we need some encouragement or hope. And He sends just the right voice or person in our past to come and give us hope. At.  just. the. perfect. time.God's Time.....
 

* OK, GOD--- Not trying to rush you, but, now I need a conversation/visit with Mama Powell. I just need to wake up laughing and smiling after a "visit" with her! Please?


#40days #lentenjourney #Dreamsdocometrue #DreamOn #Encouragingdreams