Homecoming

As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, our 4th child, son Patrick, and his fiancee' Kelley, are expecting a baby. AND as mentioned before, we were hoping they would have done things in the proper sequence: Engagement/marriage/baby. But, things were "fruitbasket turnover" and they are in THIS sequence: baby/engagement/marriage. In fact, as I had mentioned before, we were heading out to San Diego last week-end for the MARRIAGE with me/Terry and her parents, as witnesses and happy parents. Then, the scene changed. I was shopping last minute for some clothes to take on our trip to S.D. when I got a call from Kelley. I could tell she was stressed by her voice. She was in the hospital! And the first words after she told me that was that even if she got OUT of the hospital, NO MORE FLYING. So, after the words sunk I, we started changing our plans. We were going to go ahead and go and welcome Patrick off the ship but it didn't make sense b/c he was planning on coming this coming Saturday. We decided to save our tickets (or cancel) for a visit this summer when they are settled, the 3 of them, in San Diego. Things were going as planned until I got a call 2 days ago from Patrick saying that Kelley was BACK in the hospital. And, he wanted to get here!!! So, after some paperwork, he got clearance to come. He arrived last night! I stood at the bottom of the escalator and waited. Terry was in front of me. Folks coming down and I was praying I could get a shot of him without getting other people in it  and soon there he came. (had to wait till he was walking so I could only get him in the pix, tho! LOL). There he was. 7 months ago was the last time I had seen the boy. He was smiling and looked great! He walked to his dad and held out his arms. Oh, how the years fell away. Suddenly I was on Munger Circle again and I remember turning and seeing a blonde haired toddler running towards his daddy with arms outstretched. And Terry leaning down and picking him up and saying, "hey little buddy!". Almost identically only fast forward to now. Terry embracing his son and saying, "hey buddy!" it definitely kicked me in the stomach, this wave of nostalgia. And joy. All the months of prayers and worry about him being gone and seeing him standing there, still our little boy, still smiling and still the same. Where oh where has time gone?  He was standing there in his shorts and flip flops and sunglasses on top of his head and duffel bag on shoulder and yet, just as handsome like that as he is in his full Navy uniform. But he was changed, too. I sensed it immediately. I remember one night after he left for Boot Camp, sobbing my heart out in the bed. Terry was so sweet, understood my heart cry. I will admit, I love having my children all nearby. We don't see them all everyday (well, Terry sees Michael everyday b/c he works with him, lol) but we don't see Charles or Natalie and certainly not Katie b/c she lives in Madison.But, we talk to them all the time. I know where they are. I can pick up the phone and say, "what's up?" I can check on the grandbabies. But, having Patrick go into "the unknown" was almost more than I could bear. I knew I couldn't call him for 9 weeks. It was a nightmare for me. What if he got sick? Hurt? Homesick? It was tough. And , after about 2 weeks of non stop crying, Terry said one night, "he is leaving a boy and he'll return a man". At the time, I  heard those words but dismissed them b/c I didn't want to let go of my baby boy. All the others were married (well, Katie was engaged and fixing to be married at the time) and he was still my little boy. ...fast forward and yes, he did fine at BootCamp and I even survived when he had to go on other Navy "mission" type things. But, the ache was still there and I always missed him. He is the only one of my children who calls me "mama". And sometimes he , also, calls me Mom. But,  when he is stressed or sad or upset or nervous  he calls me MAMA. ANd he ALWAYS says whenever we leave each other, "I love you, mama".  The day I got the phone call when he was leaving for deployment he called and said, "Mama, what are you doing?" and I was so happy to hear from him one last time before he was leaving. I told him I was pulling into the DOLLAR TREE (haha) and he said he needed to talk to me. I had this weird feeling come over me. I won't tell the whole conversation (I did say I'd be REAL now, but I still have SOME secrets! LOL) but in a nutshell he told me that he and Kelley were having a baby. I admit, it knocked the breath out of me and I was shocked. But, I also remember sitting there, in the parking lot of DOLLAR TREE, and feeling the calm only God can give during times of stress. It was weird. It was overwhelming and it was truly a God gift. I WASN'T HAPPY. Don't get me wrong! I wasn't MAD but I was frustrated. And confused . and wondering what to do next. And then he said, "mama, my ship is leaving. I have to go". ...have any of you ever watched the old Sesame Street little clips? Well, there was one that they used to show SOOOO many years ago and it wasn't titled but it was like, "what would happen IF..." And your response to what would happen. Depending on your response to a situation. It could be a great SERMON , that little clip. Here's an example that I so remember: There was a little boy and his little sister was holding a red balloon. The little boy is thinking: If I BURST that balloon with a pin here's what could happen. ANd it gave all these things that could happen. He could pop the balloon and it showed his sister screaming . And then his mother comes and he gets in BIG trouble. And then he thought of another scene. He could tell his sister, "I love the balloon, can we share it" . Or something along those lines. In other words, he had to PLAY OUT the scene in his head before he said or did something he would later regret.What a great lesson from SESAME STREET for me all these years ! I don't always do it, but SOMETIMES I do. I did that day. I was thinking, " I could scream at Patrick and be mad and hurtful OR I could tell him that I loved him and needed time to get my head around the news". I did the latter. Let me say all of us dealt with it differently BUT IN THE END, we all embraced the pregnancy and the baby. NOT TO SAY it wasn't hard at times, b/c Katie is also pregnant but we all had to figure it out and respond. My last words to him before he got on the ship were "I love you and we will work through this." And that is exactly what has happened. There have been bumps in the road, no doubt.  There have been times when it has been hard when someone said, "I didn't even realize Patrick had gotten married yet!" And logistically they could NOT get married for 7 months. Bottom line is this: they love each other and are going to be great parents. Things might have been "fruitbasket turnover" but in the end, we all hold on to God's promise and we stand beside , front and behind them. 


Now Kelley and Patrick face some more "bumps in the road" (besides the obvious BUMP in Kelley's middle! LOL). Kelley is a diabetic and so her pregnancy she has had to take great precautions and know that b/c of that little RYDER's heart might have more stress on it due to her meds, etc. And then, she started having some bleeding so she landed in the hospital. WHich is where this blog ends at this point. SHe is in the hospital but she has Patrick there with her right now. As you look at the pictures, you will see that, 1. YES, they love each other 2. they have surmounted some problems 3. they are just beginning their journey...It's not easy. He'll be going on future deployments. She'll be away from her family and he will be away from his. They will have to learn to rely on each other but more importantly rely on the Holy Spirit to guide them/comfort them and sustain them during the months/years ahead. 


I learned, the 2nd week of Patrick's boot camp some wonderful lessons. From God AND from Terry. "LEAN ON ME". You see,  I am a "fixer" and I always want to have everything fixed. by ME, usually. This was out of my control. Surprise! It still is. Last night on the way to pick up Patrick, Terry looked at me and said, "well, that's one answer to prayer". I asked him , what was that?, and he said, "Patrick kept safe the past 7 months". And again, I had to remember how GRACIOUS our God is. How I often take for granted that fact.  Not to brag, but Terry gets up at 5 every morning and prays for our children/their spouses and grandchildren (and babies to be!). EVERY morning. Sometimes I stumble into the kitchen and see him with his eyes closed and Bible open. He takes , seriously, prayers for those he loves. And, it is BY those prayers and faith that we are able to trust Him  now. With Patrick/Kelley and Ryder. And Charles, Rachel, Powell, Blakely, Michael, Kadie, Lily, Natalie, Brad, Kemp, Daisy, Jon, Katie and soon-to-be, Carter. Sure there will be more trials. more issues. more valleys and problems And I'm not talking about just Patrick/Kelley here. I'm talking about the whole bunch. But there will ALSO be much JOY/Happiness/delight/miracles to come. I am thankful for all of them . For without those times that I have truly been in those deep, dark valleys, the joy I receive when I am lifted high from them and placed in the sun on the mountaintop are hard to describe.... Oh, and Terry was right. Patrick did leave as a boy and for sure, he has returned as a man. (and incredible one at that!).


* BTW, I do think I'll ask God for some sunglasses next time we meet on the mountaintop, tho. It's so bright I can hardly see afterwards! 

THIS SMILE SAYS IT ALL!


P.S. Please keep baby Ryder and Kelley in your prayers! We are so thankful they are doing well but , sadly, Patrick WILL have to leave. For now we are just enjoying him being here!